Grade 1's make me smile...and make me sick

We all know kids say the darndest things. I mean, there was a whole show dedicated to this. Being in a grade 1 classroom for my second placement is a breath of fresh air with me trying to suppress laughter all day long. The things they say just make me smile. They just say what's on their mind. Not only are they not afraid to say what's on their minds, they are not scared to fart at any given moment. Of course everyone giggles, including me.

And of course we all know kids are incubators of germs. I started February 4th have been sick basically the entire time. It could have something to do with the fact that they are always sticking their fingers in their mouths or sneezing all over stuff. I really wish I could have invented ColdFX...I'd be rolling in it by now.

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Kid: "Miss, is it okay if I fall asleep?"
Teacher: "No. Why do you want to sleep?"
Kid: "Cause I'm tired.
Teacher: "Would it be okay if I went to sleep?"

Second Kid: "Yeah! We should all go to sleep!"

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Student: "Miss....have you ever done a drug?"

Me: "What do you mean?"

Student: "Well, a drug is like a cigarette, beer, or a smoke."

Me: "No, not me. (lie) Have you?"

Student: "Once. Someone gave me some and I got really sick and almost died."

Me: "Drugs are bad."

Student: "Yeah..."

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Student: "Miss...how old are you?"

Me: "Twenty-five" (cringing on the inside). "Soon I'll be 26."

Student: "My mom's older than you. She's 26."

Damn.......

There is also a student that can't speak properly. I'm not sure exactly what the issue is but how he spells reflects upon how he speaks.

Long=wong

Block=bwock

Don't get me wrong. I have nothing against speech impediments. A little known fact about me is that I took speech therapy when I was younger. I apparently couldn't pronounce my sssssss.

Look at me now...Sally sells seashells by the seashore. (I really wish you could hear me to appreciate the beauty of it.)

Peter Pan Syndrome

I don't wanna grow up.

So many of my friends are having kids, getting married, moving in together, starting their careers, etc etc. Sure I'm 25. Sure, if this were 20 years ago I'd be married, with a job (or not) and have probably 3 kids already. But this is 2011 and that's just not the trend. Not that I think one way is right or not.

As of recently a lot of people have been telling me I need to get ready to join the "real world". Am I not living in this world already? And who says I have to. Taxes, mortgages, c-sections, divorce...doesn't sound all that great to me.

I think going to school for longer just sets us all up for disappointment and failure in the long run. Sure we may get a better paying job, learn more about the world....but we're also forced to be "teenagers" for much longer than ever imagined or meant to be. No job, few responsibilities, drinking throughout the week....tough one. I blame society.

It's true, in about 4 months I will graduate. I will be a certified teacher. So will thousands of other hopeful Canadians. In truth, the odds of finding a job right away are mostly nonexistant. Our professors tell us that. They are basically trying to scare away people from the program because there's so many of us.

I have no idea what I'm going to do upon graduation. Move back home? Get a waitressing job to tie me over? That doesn't sound like growing up to me.

I'm not sure if I'll ever fully mature to what people may think is a functioning adult. I will always find Family Guy hilarious and relevant, among other cartoons. Cereal is appropriate at any time of the day. Spending all day Saturday in your pajamas is completely normal. Some words will always be humourous and make me giggle....'seamen' (the Navy didn't quite think that one through did they?)

I don't think paying bills and taxes is a way to measure our maturity level. I like to think you're only as old as you feel. I should be coming up on 18 any day now...

You laughed didn't you?

Resolutions, Veganism, and other challenges

I am not a vegan, but one of my roommates is. It's not my personal choice of course, but I respect her decision and commend her for sticking with it. I've also been introduced to new foods that I've always wanted to try on my own but been too 'chicken' to attempt to make. I've had spaghetti squash, homemade falafels, and seitan just to name a few. All delish and all meals vegan.

Now my new year's resolution is not to become vegan, or even vegetarian for that matter. But, as most people resolve to eat healthier, get in shape, lose weight...blah blah blah...I thought I'd do my own take on it. At least one night a week, I am going to try to have one meal that is completely vegetarian. I know that probably doesn't sound like much, but I thought I'd get more veggies in this way. I can't do the vegan thing though because I can't give up dairy. I really like my cheese...I mean hey, it's even in my name right?

So tonight I made a delicious vegetarian Mediterranean wrap and here is the recipe. (Sorry I kind of just eyeball stuff so there are no measurements).

Vegetables I used:
eggplant, zucchini, red pepper, mushrooms, red onion

Homemade pesto ingredients:
basil
romano cheese
garlic
goat cheese
pine nuts
extra virgin olive oil

Whole Wheat Tortilla Wrap

Directions:

Slice each vegetable and drizzle with extra virgin olive oil and balsamic vinegar to taste. Roast in a 400 degree oven for about 20 minutes.
Meanwhile, pulse basil, pine nuts, and garlic in a blender. Drizzle in olive oil and pulse to form paste. Add goat cheese and romano cheese. Blend together.

Spread the pesto on the tortilla wrap and top with roasted vegetables. Enjoy!

Note: Later in the week I used the pesto and leftover veggies and stirred them all in with pasta. Another successful vegetarian meal. Aren't you proud of me?! Except, now all I'm craving is a steak....this is gonna be interesting....

A Year Gone by

I did it. I made it through another year. Although it has been by far, my craziest, most random, wonderful, memorable year to date....some things are definitely a fuzzy blur. This may or may not be due to some overindulgence on my part.

Starting from the beginning I thought it would be appropriate to take you through my little journey of 2010 to the start of 2011.

2010 started with new friends in Taipei, Taiwan watching Taipei 101 "explode" and walking hours upon hours trying desperately to find a random hotel party. (Which we eventually found, and partied like rock stars till the morning light).

Shortly after our "Western new years" we were able to celebrate Chinese New Year. With weeks off work, we set off for Boracay, Phillipines. This beautiful white sand beach is a tiny island and is magnificant. If you ever have the chance to go...do it! Parasailing, snorkeling, go carting in the mountains, giant bats, corn in the streets, hookah on the beach, horseback riding, and bartenders on fire - literally...oops! The bartender was a good sport about it all though.

About a month later I turned the big 25 and had a minor quarter life crisis but realized I'm still young and that whining about getting older while still in my 20s is absolutely ridiculous. I've seen things at 25 people will never get to see in their lifetime. So I decided to live in the moment and just enjoy what comes my way. Which often includes cold beers and happiness. (No need for sadness and warm beers right JPD?)

*Note: There are very few pics from this night because I needed to go home early and have a little birthday nap. Whiskey shots are not my friend.

Sometime after my birthday many things happened around April and May. I was accepted to teacher's college, my friends and I competed in a flour fight (yes that's right), Menace and I got into a little scooter accident, Menace turned 25 in toga style, and we put into motion our travel plans. Which meant our last day of work happened on June 30. Those last few months in Taiwan happened fast and furious.

We commenced our month long journey of travelling through Laos, Chiang Mai, Thailand, and Bali, Indonesia. I hope to someday be able to go back to these places because there really is such beauty left undiscovered and so much to do and learn. Menace and I really did not have sufficient time to immerse ourselves in the culture. Some highlights of the entire trip for me would have to be riding elephants, Thai cooking, getting my second tattoo, rafting, monkey forest, and of course the Gili islands. If you want to read more about Menace and Cheddar Bob's trip our old blog is still up at http://menaceandcheddarbob.blogspot.com/

August was my return to Canada and things happened quickly. I moved into a new place at school and started school again. I like to keep myself on my toes.

Teacher's college is definitely it's own culture and it's a little like high school again. You have classes with the same people everyday (or in my case Monday - Wednesday). It's a weird feeling of balancing both being a student and a teacher. Although I can't wait to be finished with school again, I have no clue what's going to happen when I graduate.

The new year brings new resolutions, a new age (26! eeeeek), new friends, and no doubt some new adventures.

My Grown up Christmas List

This year I'm spending Christmas at home in Canada. Last year in Taiwan, working on Christmas day, not being surrounded by family and friends or decorations of any kind was slightly depressing. So, as you can guess I have been giddy and excited about once again being part of the holiday madness. I assumed Christmas would change as I got older...but I was hoping for some of that child-like wonder and awe to introduce me back into the tradition. I guess at the pivotal age of 25, that is too much to ask for.

The Christmas Tree

Putting up and decorating the tree is by far one of my favourite things to do. Ever since I was little it was something we could do as a family. Christmas music would fill the air and our tree was trimmed with the most hideous ornaments, (made especially by yours truly and the brothers), and the tree came out looking like a rainbow had thrown up all over it. Super dad would lift us up to place the star/angel on top of the tree. Every year we switched it up so when it was your turn...you were on top of the world. Literally at that age. Perfect right?

This year, I decorated (our fake) Christmas tree alone. I brought it up from the basement. I wrestled with it trying to figure out how to put it together and get it to light. Younger brother did assist me but then quickly retired to play video games. So I hauled out the Christmas decorations, now matched only to silver and gold and decorated our perfect tree. I did have Christmas music playing in the background but younger brother squashed that as soon as it happened and Sportscentre filled the air instead. The angel was placed on top by younger brother, with no stool or chair or lift. He can reach it. (I would've needed a boost).

Extended Family Christmas

For the most part, celebrations on dad's side haven't changed too much. His side of the family is fond of tradition and not fond of change. Of course new people are thrown into the mix as our family grows. But we still eat too much food, try to beat grandpa at euchre (inevitably failing), and the same jokes are still muttered around the table ("more heavy gravy?"). I'm still forced to be the "santa" and hand out presents from the tree. At 25, it's just embarrassing. Thank goodness the hat wasn't there. But as the youngest person is 22, the wine flows quickly and the whiskey is poured (Golden Wedding anyone?). Grandma calls me an alcoholic and it's time to go home.

On my mom's side, there are no toddlers running around either and the glasses of wine are encouraged. Inappropriate jokes are made and good times are had by all. It's an interesting time when everyone is old enough to just enjoy each other's company without having to worry about small children.

Getting together with Friends

As a university student, coming home for Christmas was a time filled with haziness and beer soaked Christmas sweaters. This is something that has definitely changed. I am now 25, and most of my friends have "real" jobs, or significant others, or kids, I find myself going stir crazy trying to find people who have as much free time as me. I've never enjoyed drinking alone but I may have to change my opinion on the matter.

Christmas Shopping

Spending money is something I am very good at. I'm not sure how I do it so easily, but it's magical how I can quickly turn something into nothing. As a kid, mom or dad did most of the shopping for me. Of course I picked out that one really bad gift I thought was amazing. Christmas pin for mom and tie for dad. Their faces never showed their true feelings of disappointment. And of course, as a kid, let's be honest, we're selfish creatures. It was about what you had under the tree. You hoped that oversized package so carefully wrapped and tied was yours. And you hoped being extra good for the month of December was good enough to make up for all year long in Santa's eyes. It usually was.

As an adult, I really do love Christmas shopping. Yes the stores are crowded and lines are terrible. But it is worth it to find that perfect gift for someone and on Christmas morning watch them tear away the paper to reveal that great idea you had. So I can truly say I've matured to the point that it's more about what I give than what I get. Now don't get me wrong. I'm not completely unselfish. I know myself well. I will still wake up at an ungodly hour to peek at my stocking stuffed with goodies and impatiently wait for dad to get home from chores and wake up the household.

Of course there are classic Christmas traditions that will never change or leave my life. National Lampoon's Christmas vacation and cousin Eddie's antics, taboozing, ugly Christmas sweaters, and of course getting to spend time with some of my favourite people.

Then there are the things you are so glad you've grown out of (peeking for one...I'm so sorry mom, I was a snoopy little girl), and the things you get to grow into (Christmas morning shots with the family!)

So I guess when you reach the quarter life mark things are bound to change. Thank God we have alcohol to get us through this difficult time.

What a cute little hairball!

I have been waiting nearly a month to meet him, but it was so worth the wait! Love at first sight. Laura and Corey you make beautiful babies! Meet Chase: born November 19, 2010 10lbs 1 oz. Look at all that hair!

PS...tis the season for ugly Christmas sweaters!

Indecent Proposal

I was made an offer that I definitely could refuse.

Some time ago a "friend" (and I use that term loosely) added me to Facebook. I had not talked to this person for about 4 or 5 years and knew him through a friend of mine. He's always been slightly strange and pervy, but I thought...what's the harm.

He would message me a lot and compliment me (which basically consisted of making me feel uncomfortable). He became increasingly creepy.

One day he wanted to ask me a "weird question".

"Shoot" I said.

"Would you watch a relatively good looking guy masturbate for $1000? You don't have to do anything, you just have to watch."

I paused. All I could think was...I really hope this is hypothetical.

"I don't think so." I replied

"You don't have to do anything to yourself. All I want you to do is watch."

Now I'm starting to think this is not hypothetical. And I'm starting to get disgusted and angry.

"No. You're right that was a weird question. Please don't ask me that again."

"Just thought I'd check."

"Maybe you should try Chat Roulette. I heard people do that all the time on there."

And that was the end of that conversation. Or so I thought.

I should have deleted him after that comment. But I didn't. And about a week ago, he upped the offer.

"Are you sure you couldn't use an extra $3000?"

"No."

Remove from friends.

This was wrong on so many levels.

First of all. I barely know the guy.

Second, why would you pay someone for that? Can't you get that on your own?

Third, ewwwwww. And, asking me that is completely offensive. I know I'm a starving student and all, but come on.

I don't understand what a person gets out of that. It's just as bad as those men who go around in trenchcoats popping out from behind dumpsters and just go to town on themselves. Excuse me sir, but I'm just heading to get a coffee, and I don't remember asking for extra cream.

I told this story to my mom and all she could say was "I don't know dear, $1000 is a lot of money." I mean make it $5000 and then we'll talk. I could've had a very Merry Christmas indeed.